It hadn’t sunk in Braxyd was gone for good until he had...done the deed. I couldn’t even form the words in my head. How could he? I knew he had always loved Max, was blinded to everyone else. But I had believed that he cared for me even if he didn’t show it. At least enough that he wouldn’t... I watched the monitor as if it would spike. But I didn’t have a heart. I brushed my hair to the side without taking my sky colored eyes off the monitor. My blue hair. My unnatural blue hair. I hated it suddenly. But I didn’t: I didn’t have a heart. I clawed at it, pulled out a few strands and as much as I tried to cry, I couldn’t.
I remembered how crying always helped me feel better and I tried, I really did, to cry. Of course I couldn’t though. I sighed and laid back on my pillow. My sky blue eyes fell on a plate of toast beside my bed. VI must have made a special trip to fetch bread, just for me. The clarity of not having a heart suddenly came over me. I had thought before of joining Braxyd, going to persuade him to return. But now of course I couldn’t do that. I had to stay with the organization and try to keep it from falling apart. Superior and IX we’re off alone more and more often now. I feared our leadership structure would fall apart when we most needed it, or rather acknowledged the problem. I had no heart. A clock ticked. My heart did not. Seycax, VI was who I would follow. She was level headed and always had the best interest of the organization in mind.
-VII
VII keeps following me around. When I replace books on the shelves of the library, she follows me. She can not wear the organization robes, it makes her sweat and overexert herself. Really she shouldn’t be out of bed at all. She wears loose drawstring pants and thick white bandages wrapped around her abdomen. She doesn’t talk as much anymore but thinks a lot, all the while following me.
At first it was annoying. One night though I had to use the bathroom but in the hallway I found VII sitting against the wall right outside my room. She had her fans unfurled as if she needed to protect herself...or me. Her brow was furrowed in her sleep as if she was having a bad dream. Her body looked so thin with only the bandages and no robe. When had she become so thin? How had none of us noticed? She had must have stopped eating regularly when IV left. She shivered in her sleep. I wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and tiptoes past her to the bathroom.
In the morning I made breakfast for everyone in the hopes that VII would eat a good meal for once. That got her talking up a storm again like normal. She talked so much that most of the other members took their plates and excused themselves to their rooms. I chuckled. It was so nice to hear her chatter again like normal that I didn’t silence her like usual. Everyday she still guards my door and follows me around. She has a bit more color in her pale cheeks and more meat on her bones though. All the while she’s trying to take care of me I’m taking care of her.
-VI
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