The Remnants of Organization IV

It was one of things that you never thought would happen until it was several years after it finally did. That's how it was for me when the Organization disbanded. Not officially, but there was no way of bringing it back either. I blame myself, sometimes, for what happened. I was the first to leave, go do my own thing. I don't blame myself for long. Mostly I blame the VIII kid, or the newest chick. I never blame myself for long.

It didn't seem like a big deal at first. I left, then V disappeared and really wasn't heard from, then Braxyd went where he pleased whenever he pleased, then several others just vanished, like they never even existed. Superior and II stuck together, with IX too, but everyone else stopped frequenting the castle. Last time I went back, the place was deserted and just gave up an unhealthy, neglected air.

I don't do anything with my life. Whether I'm rotting in the street or in a jail cell, I don't care anymore. I could work, and I could do something with my miserable existence, but I choose not to. Choose. I swear. I can't say I try not to get in trouble. I don't necessarily go looking for a fight either. But when Braxyd showed up one day with a brilliant plan for a heist, I couldn't say no. I was sucked in, like a stupid little meaningless bug to a big inviting lamp.

I can't say it went badly. I mean, sure, we were running for our lives with the cops on our tails and are arms not much more than empty. It was fun, that's all that mattered. Well... it was fun... for a while there...

He was the first to get caught. Rounded the corner and BOOM. Tasered by one of those stupid Turks. They're always snooping around and getting into business that's not theirs to get into. I froze, not going around the corner. I wanted to Braxyd get out of that mess. As soon as I mustered the stupidity to do so, I rounded the corner at full speed, ready to attack. First thing I did was bust Braxyd out of his handcuffs. That's about where my plan ended, and I just kind of stood there, looking ready to attack but taking no initiative. I heard Braxyd say my name, but before I could respond I was hit with the most jolting and painful feeling, and blacked out.

     Daxjorn was watching me again. She sat in one of the over sized chairs near the window in the library drinking tea and eating toast. She was healing, slowly, but making progress. I could tell she was itching to ask one of her questions, but also hesitating to.
     "What is it VII?" I asked as I put several books.
     "VI? What do you think's going to happen. I mean, Braxyd's back and-"
     I cut her of, "VII, leave it be. Nothing has happened yet. We do not know that anything WILL happen."
     "But he sta-"
     "Daxjorn. Drop it." I had stopped shelving the books, but I hadn't turn to look at her. I thought I had managed to silence her with my harsh tone. It had come out harsher than I had meant, but it had done the job.
     The truth was I didn't want to think about what would happen if the Organization ended. I wouldn't have anywhere to go, anywhere where I could fit in. It made me anxious, all the waiting, but it was better than getting involved.
     I finished shelving and turned. Daxjorn was staring out the window into the bleak world that surrounded the castle. I walked to my desk and sat in it.
     Waiting was better than taking sides.